This was an important enough segment I felt I had to provide the full transcript of it for everyone. On Tuesday night, Jon Stewart returned from vacation to deliver an incredible segment just ripping into Fox News, specifically Bill O'Reilly and Sean Hannity, for their delusional remarks about the unrest in Ferguson, Missouri.
Obviously, the big news of the past few weeks, the town of Ferguson, Missouri, where the shooting by police of teenager Michael Brown has sparked a series of protests, which in turn, sparked a — let's say — stern response by police, who appear to be auditioning for Robocop. It's a story that has a lot of people outraged and upset.
BILL O'REILLY (8/20/2014): I came back from vacation because I am furious.
Of course you are! An unarmed black teenager gunned down in the street by police under suspicious circumstances? Who wouldn't cut their vacation short to register their fury? You'd have to be a monster. Or, in my case, enjoying a particularly nice vacation. (audience laughter)
But good on you, Mr. O'Reilly, for coming back. Unless, of course, you're furious about something else.
BILL O'REILLY (8/20/2014): Furious, about how the shooting death of 18-year-old Michael Brown is being reported, and how various people are reacting to it.
Yes! That is the outrage. The shooting of Michael Brown, and any lack of transparency from the police department responsible for said incident is outrageous... in how it has been reported.
And I guess that's not the only reason to be angry.
ANDREA TANTAROS (8/20/2014): Is he going to get a fair shake, this officer?
STEVE DOOCY (8/25/2014): There has been a rush to judgment.
LAURA INGRAHAM (8/19/2014): Eric Holder flies into Ferguson, with his superhero cape.
LINDA CHAVEZ (8/25/2014): This mantra of the unarmed black teenager shot by a white cop — you know, that description in and of itself actually colors the way in which we look at this story.
Yes, describing the actual facts of the case... really does color the way we look at it. "White cop shoots unarmed black teen" does sound terrible. Whereas, say, "Hero cop kills alien hunting humans for sport" would put a completely different spin on things. Which, though a very accurate description of the plot of Predator 2, is in this case, not what happened.
And you know what? There's so many other stories out there.
6/18/2014:
LOU DOBBS: Why aren't we covering New York?
JOHN FUND: Why aren't we covering black-on-black crime?
Yes! Why all the interest in holding police officers to a higher standard than gangs? (audience laughter) They both flash colors. And yes, one of them has been sworn to protect and defend, but still.
SEAN HANNITY (8/25/2014): Well, this weekend, 42 people shot in Chicago. I don't see the protests, I don't see the anger.
ANDREA TANTAROS (8/23/2014): If I were African-American, I would be outraged that more journalists aren't covering what's happening in Chicago, and more outraged that people like Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson don't head to those areas.
Yes! What could explain the lack of outrage about Al Sharpton and his ilk not doing anything about black-on-black violence in Chicago?
ABC7 (7/10/2014): With Chicago's violence making national headlines, a group led by the Reverend Al Sharpton plans to convene an anti-violence summit of national civil rights leaders here.
Oh, that's right, because African-American leaders did hold a summit about that in November. And have met at least three times in the city just in the last 13 months. Which is not to say it's been effective, but taken along with the President's My Brother's Keeper initiative, which attempts to address this violence, and the countless vigils and marches within these violence-torn communities means they are trying, actually, to do something. You see, you being ignorant of those attempts doesn't mean the issue itself is being ignored. The same way that when it snows where you live doesn't mean the world isn't getting hotter. (massive audience cheering and applause) Fuck.
Oh you know what? There's something else bothering you, isn't there?
SEAN HANNITY (8/13/2014): When a cop pulls me over I say... I put my hands outside of the car. If I'm carrying a weapon, which I'm licensed to carry in New York, the first thing I tell the police officer is, "Officer, I want you to know I have a legal firearm in the car."
"And then, I brace myself for the taser." (audience laughter)
Well, without getting into the fact that you get pulled over so much by the cops that sometimes you're carrying a weapon, sometimes you're not. "I dunno, it just depends on how I'm feeling that day!" But continue!
SEAN HANNITY (8/13/2014): I often would even take my... my... step out of the car, lift my shirt up so he can see where the gun is.
(shocked audience laughter)
You really do have no fucking idea, do you? Do you, dude? (wild audience applause)
Basically, you're saying if only Michael Brown, instead of holding his hands over his head, had reached down to his waist, and lifted up his shirt to show the gun he did not actually have — well, this whole tragedy could have been avoided?
Do you not understand that life in this country is inherently different for white people and black people?
ANDREA TANTAROS (8/15/2014): A lot of people are trying to make this, Dana, about black and white, and trying to make this about race.
FOX NEWS GUY (8/19/2014): This is part of this effort to make everything about race.
TUCKER CARLSON (8/16/2014): Is this a story about race? Do we know that?
LINDA CHAVEZ (8/25/2014): I think it is playing the race card, and I think it's disgraceful.
MARK FUHRMAN (8/20/2014): The only racial divide that is created here is being created by the race-baiters.
JONATHAN HOENIG (8/24/2014): You know who talks about race? Racists!
(shocked audience laughter)
Did you just "He who smelt it, dealt it" racism??? (wild audience cheering and laughter) Did you really "He who smelt it, dealt it" racism???
All right. Forget that in Ferguson, 94% of the police are white and 63% of the people are black. Forget that 92% of police searches and 86% of car stops are for black people. Forget that the white municipal government finances nearly a quarter of its annual budget through the fines and penalties disproportionately leveled against the black proportion of the population. Forget that the history of this town includes this tasty nugget.
CRAIG MELVIN (8/20/2014): A 52-year-old man named Henry Davis said that four Ferguson police officers beat him, then charged him with damaging government property because his blood had gotten on the officers' uniforms.
(audience booing)
So let me get this straight. You guys got tanks, but you can't keep a couple of Tide sticks around?
(audience cheering)
Because here's the problem with everything that's going on in this conversation. This isn't all about just one man killed in one town. It's about how people of color, no matter their socioeconomic standing, face obstacles in this country with surprising grace.
Look at how upset you all get about certain things.
FOX NEWS PROMO (12/2/2013): Tonight, Christmas under attack.
BILL O'REILLY (12/2/2013): Why are we allowing anti-Christmas madness?
GRETCHEN CARLSON (12/10/2013): Why do I have to drive around with my kids to look for Nativity scenes, and be like, "oh yeah, kids, look, there's Baby Jesus behind the Festivus pole made out of beer cans"? It's nuts!
(audience laughter)
Remember? You were furious that America's 11-month long celebration of Christmas wasn't enough. But now, if you can, just imagine that instead of having to suffer the indignity of a Festivus pole blocking something you could've just set up in your own yard anyway — imagine that instead of that, on a pretty consistent basis, you can't get a fucking cab even though you're a neurosurgeon, cuz you're black. (massive audience applause)
I guarantee you that every person of color in this country has faced an indignity from the ridiculous, to the grotesque, to the sometimes fatal, at some point in their — I'm gonna say — last couple of hours. Because of their skin color.
Quick story. So we live in New York City, a liberal bastion. (scattered audience cheering) Let me finish. (audience laughter) Recently, we sent a correspondent and a producer to a building in this liberal bastion, where we were going to tape an interview. The producer — white — dressed in what can only be described as homeless elf attire, and a pretty strong 5-o'clock-from-the-previous-week shadow, strode confidently into the building preceding our humble correspondent — a gentleman of color — dressed resplendently in a tailored suit. Who do you think was stopped? Let me give you a hint: the black guy.
And that shit happens all the time. All the time. Race is there, and it is a constant. You're tired of hearing about it? Imagine how fucking exhausting it is living it.
about cops killing unarmed black men.
Then last night, Stephen talked about Fox News's whining about the media coverage of Ferguson in his own special way. Here's the crux of it.