Thanks to a Chapter 7 Bankruptcy this last spring (of which more in a later diary), my 61 years of acquisition and exceptional credit record are -- sob! -- gone for good. But as the only child of an acquisitive mother who died in 2006, and imbued with Inverse Seasonal Affective Disorder, I've begun a detailed inventory of all her tchotchkes I can put out in an estate sale this coming spring.
Mother was a terribly fearful Christian. That is, she was more terrified of her own death than she was of her only child dying an atheist. I often regretted being unable to soothe her, but my Atheist Creed forbade lying, so there it was.
Hang in there with me. Here comes the good part, below the fleur de Kos.
One of the main inventory categories is Christmas stuff (or, as I abbreviated it on my Excel spreadsheet, XMAS. Can you imagine the residual guilt from that simple act?) Well, anyway, of the >30 boxes of unused light strings, three had come from our own favorite craft store, Hobby Lobby.
Hobby Lobby, the business convinced that it has the righteous power to dictate health care actions to its female employees, because FreeDumz, you know. I suspect most of you know the details.
Ay, long did I debate whether to just throw those three tiny boxes out, crush them under my heel, soak them in lemon juice (or bad wine) or some other contemptuous act. I concluded, however, that such acts would go unnoticed. So I decided to put them on sale anyway, for a respectable $0.25 for 70 lights. With one -- or rather, six editorial comments per box.
The "Hbby Lbby" logo appeared 6 times on each box. So I found a thick-but-not-too-thick Sharpie (tm) and marked madly through each before attaching the price sticker.
The buyer would have to notice the editorial comment and consider me either (1) a demon from hell; (2) a politically savvy exhibitionist; or (3) estúpida. Either way, I'd have made my point. And if no one bought those three boxes, they'd be crushed under my heel, soaked in lemon juice (or bad wine) then thrown out -- in full view of the last customer.
Any way you count it, it would be a win.