I have been mulling this feeling for the last couple of days, since Katrina hit and the enormity of the disaster became clear.
I find that each new catastrophic event brings me instantly to a state of anger and despair.
I can attribute this state to cumulative trauma, caused by BushCo actions and reactions.
Now before you turn away, thinking I'm a noodle, check out this list:
- The 2000 election and the disgusting partisan hijacking of the presidency. Al Gore was elected, but we were not allowed to have him in office.
- The prolonged vote count that was then precipitously stopped by the SCOTUS conservatives.
- The attacks of Sept. 11, 2001. Nuff said.
- The BushCo response to 9/11, with all the posturing at Ground Zero, the "dead or alive" bullshit, and the overall delight the neocons took in the perfect excuse to take over the Middle East and its oil fields.
- The weird patriotism after 9/11, when I felt I better put a flag on my car or I might get attacked.
- The runup to the war in Iraq, with all the lies and the feelings of powerlessness in anyone with a brain who could see the falsity of the whole enterprise.
- The beginning of the war...Shock and Awe, anyone?
- Bushie's premature ejaculation on the Abraham Lincoln...Mission Accomplished!!! (not)
- The constant vilification of anyone who spoke against the Iraq adventure from the start, with the claim that we were not patriotic and that we hated America. This poison eats at one's heart no matter how wrong one knows it is.
- The 2004 election, with the continued hate campaigns against Kerry and anyone who did not lick Bush's toes. Dems should have cleaned the Repub's clock, but somehow the people don't see the corruption and filth there.
- The second stolen election. I happen to believe the exit polls. I didn't think I could feel worse, but I definitely wanted to sleep forever once the election was called for the idiot AWOL chimp yet again.
- The Tsunami of Christmas 2004.
- The vilification (again) of Cindy Sheehan is a recent irritant. Hate, hate, hate. It's the only weapon the Rightwing uses.
14, etc: There are lots of others; the Medicare vote in the House of Reps...what a charade and what a disaster; repeal of environmental protections; tax cuts on top of tax cuts with unfunded mandates as far as the eye can see; historic storm events due to global warming (which doesn't exist if you ask BushCo).
Then this week: a storm of Biblical proportions, drowing a whole region and killing hundreds of mostly black Americans. Levies that have been neglected because of Bush fiscal and war policy. And Bush is golfing and making speeches filled with lies, and playing guitar while people die.
Today: Hundreds in a religious gathering, killed in Baghdad due to fear of terrorists (who were not in their country until Bush brought them there).
We must regain the White House, the Congress and the statehouses. Yet it's hard to stay motivated for election work when we lose battles we should win. It's hard not to stop paying attention to the news and the issues when we make so little progress.
Sorry for the long rambling screed. I am really OK and I will not stop trying. But these are the moments that try our resolve.
Thank god for Daily Kos, really, it's what I read to feel better.