the weekend dk4 opened, my mom transitioned - she entered the new state of being with a look of amazement and awe on her face, so my sister who was with her described that moment when her soul discarded that worn out vessel that served her for almost 94 years (just shy of 3 weeks, actually).
as i travelled across the country, seeing the southern route for the first time, the states melded into new territory, new landscapes in a daliesque vision of what had been, what was and what was to come.
more musings about roads long travelled, if you bear with me across this stream of consciousness...
for sixty five seasons, i've watched the world revolve around me, i've wondered and pondered the most amazing things - small birds that sat on my fingers and looked into my eyes as if to ask what creature are you?
most revolve around my mother, she who tolerated the birds, crickets, chameleons (but DID draw the line at the snake entwined around my fingers) and those creatures who lived within our sphere: the talking chihuahua (she was the one who said if he was howling for food, he could just well learn to ASK for it -- he did. could say "i WRANT it!" with such authority and clarity that total strangers would say "HERE! you can HAVE it!" then there were the birds, parakeets with huge vocabularies, the street cat that adopted us (thanks to dad) and many, many pups that passed through our lives.
most of our dogs lived well into their teens, some to 17 - even the big ones. they knew a good thing when they found it!
driving across the country with my diabetic samoyed (who delightfully accepts his homecooked meals that control his genetic fluke), all of the past had time to sift into our drive - to sit a while and stay, only to blow away like the dustdevils in texas.
the flat brown lands gradually turned into rolling hills and hints of the greening yet to come - buds waiting to burst forth in new life but not yet awakened from the deep sleep of winter.
it was at this transition of the seasons that my mother chose to leap into her new existence - that bud just ready to flower but not here, not of this winter or spring. instead she is springing forth into that ethereal world that knows not of physical limitation, free of bodies that betray all of us in the end - for none of us will escape the ultimate wearing down of the organic matter that transports us through this world.
as einstein said, energy can neither be created or destroyed - it simply changes, just as death is not an end but a new beginning in a new form - from one existence to another.
many people look to religion, many people deny continuation - but no matter how we, as individuals choose to "see" the circle of life, it continues in spite of our definitions. i choose to see life for what it is - energy in physical form until it is released from one limitation to find yet another means of expression.
from california to arizona - new mexico to texas. into louisiana, mississippi, georgia - then through south carolina into north carolina - life was awakening - trees budding, flowers pushing up through terra into the fullness of air and sky. all of this carried me across almost 3000 miles to realize that my mother made that same journey in a matter of a heartbeat - a smile - an awareness that all things never end. they just change.