I have written before about how far under I am when it comes to my medical bills as well how some healthcare entities have started to demand cash up front. Well I hate being poor. I hate not having the cash to pay off all my medical bills in one big payment. I hate owing money. I'm not lazy, nor am I a bum. I work at least 40 hours a week and many weeks I work much more. It all depends on how my back is doing that week. Two weeks ago I put in 61 hours and last week I was only able to work 45. I earn a decent living. My wife who has been like a huge rock of support for me has found a good job and is now bringing in cash as well yet we can't get ahead of the game. Seems like every time we start to get just a bit ahead along comes someone with their hands out demanding money.
Where does the cash go ? It seems like we can't get ahead even a little bit. We are in desperate need of a new hot water heater, the AC needs to be repaired before summer and the normal 90 plus degree weather and 90% humidity. Both the water heater and the AC were new when we moved in 12 years ago. The dishwasher broke 2 years ago and we can't afford a new one. Our bed is about 10 years old and has 2 large dips where we sleep. It isn't like our old one which had a pillow top on both sides so we could flip it. We do rotate it but it doesn't help, the dips just get bigger. That sure doesn't help my back as messed up as it is . A new one is way out of reach. Minimum of $800.00 bucks. Let's not forget the car. At 12 years old it is starting to cost more and more to keep it running. Forget a new one or even a beat up used one. No extra cash for anything like that. Most of our "extra" cash goes to pay down my medical bills so I can keep being treated. I owe almost $800.00 to my pain management clinic, well over 2 grand to my hospital for the many tests and even my PCP has an outstanding bill for almost $200.00. Yet I have a "decent" insurance policy. a 90/10 plan. It does have a $2500.00 a year deductible and another $1000.00 a year drug deductible. At least with the drugs, after that $1000.00 it is free and I do get the discounted price so that does help otherwise I would hit the $1000.00 in 1 month. Still I am drowning under medical bills.
I know I will get a few or more people saying that this shows why we need to switch to single payer. I am all for that. I get it every time I see my stack of unpaid bills but I need to get a 2nd job for 40+ hours a week to pay this crap off. That is impossible with my back the way it is. I have no energy left after my first job. Fighting my pain for 8 hours a day leaves me completely drained and in pain. By 8 hours my pain level is at about a 7 on most days and won't go down until I lay down for at least an hour or more. So how am I supposed to earn anything extra to pay for the stuff we need to replace of ix yesterday ? Rob a bank or a quickie mart ? No way I can do that, not being able to run away heads the list of why nots as well as the thought of me in jail and then of course the fact I am just too nice. I would be worried I was traumatizing the clerk and apologizing left and right. Maybe I can get Mitt Romney to adopt me. Then I can inherit it just like he did.
You know I am not the only one in this position. The ACA was supposed to keep this from happening but even when you have great insurance you have costs. Now unless you happen to be mega rich or the CEO of some huge corporation your just one major medical event away from bankruptcy. I am so glad they passed the ACA. Don't get me wrong on that. It is a huge step forward towards helping everyone afford decent health care but the hope that it would eliminate medical bankruptcy was a pipe dream.
Anyone with a chronic condition will end up with bills that quickly mount up. If you need surgery, even for something minor, the bills will be large and put a big bight into your finances.
Well some of you are probably thinking why doesn't he use his tax refund to pay off some of them. That's easy to answer I had to pay this year. Yep we owed $65.00 when all was said and done. Could have been much worse of course but still no refund. That's what I get for trying to set my withholding at 34 exemptions. Yes that is completely legal as long as you file with the correct number. I did it because we needed a little extra money to take care of some very needed expenses at the time and I forgot to switch it back, okay that was a lie I didn't forget. I kept needing the extra money. That extra $150 or so per check came in pretty handy. Basically it kept food on the table. So why don't we get food stamps ? Well SNAP benefits are calculated pre tax and in our state do not take into account actual expenditures like rent, utilities and anything else so my before tax earnings disqualify us and that was before the wonderful wife had gotten a job.
So where does all the money go ? I keep asking and I keeping wondering. I think we should be in pretty good shape yet we aren't. Don't suggest bankruptcy. Soon as I file that my doctors will stop my treatments and that just can't happen. Hell it is bad enough I was forced to dump my surgeon because of the hospital where he worked as I told you all in a previous diary. Seems like an honest, hard working, nice guy is destined to finish last in the rat race of life. I mean hell take a look at the Koch Brothers. They have more money they can spend in 3 lifetimes and yet it is never ever enough for them. They could wipe out my debt in about 1 minute and never feel one little pinch from the loss of that cash. They advocate for all kinds of nasty little things that hurt the poor like killing social security, killing and all parts of the social safety net all in the name of profits. If Karma really worked the way we want it to they would lose all of their money over night and be forced to rely that very same social safety net but we all know that will never happen. Instead the nice guys get dumped upon, time after time.
I guess I am just tired of fighting. I fight my pain. I fight my doctors to get treated. I fight against the crap society heaps upon those of us who have to use opioid pain medications to get through the day. Seems like I am always fighting for something and yet I can't seem to get even a small bit ahead. Seems like everytime I get 1 step ahead I wind up going three steps back. Maybe I just need a nap. or a vacation. Haven't been able to go on one of those in 10 years. The last time I went on vacation it was actually to head up to Michigan to attend 2 funerals. Not much of a vacation if you ask me.