I can’t sleep at my current address any more. Minus any other options, I found a hotel with a monthly rate. Its getting harder for me to think with banging over my head all the time. I can’t think of any other options.
It has wifi, but I don’t have any devices that use wifi, just this desktop computer. That means that I will have to go to the library for internet, and I won’t be able to communicate with you here very often. I will drop back in occasionally.
When I first came here I tried to explain a lot of the things going on here in Pueblo, not so much because I wanted people to understand my life, but because I'd become aware of how incomprehensible my world is to middle class America.
There isn’t much of a social safety net left in America. There is less of one here then there was even a couple years ago.
I thought I should try to explain that. I'm not sure I really ever accomplished anything. I've realized that your world is equally incomprehensible to me, which is interesting because I used to live in something like it myself. I never had much, but sometimes I was close.
Thank you for reading this. I hope I can come back eventually. I hope I wasn't too annoying while I was here. Writing here helped me. I hope at least some of the things made sense to someone here, but I'm not sure they did.
Somewhere along the way I realized that we need people for reasons other than simply needing friends or family. When we explain ourselves to those around us, it helps us know who we are. When you spend years alone and hardly speak a word to anyone, things you once knew are forgotten. Communicating with people here helped me remember who I was.
I know I’ll never make it back to the world you all live in now, but I’m still going to try to put the story up on the internet I’ve been working on for the last six years. I will get a zip drive and put the files on there, and use the library. I will probably see kos there occasionally.
I will see replies to this article eventually, but I may not be here long enough to reply to everyone today. I will respond when I can.